Trash talk

29Jun06

The subject of the e-mail read “Where’s my freakin’ garbage can?”

A coworker honestly believed that one of the people on our team had taken his garbage can. It was beyond me why he e-mailed us, as though we took it, instead of just asking for a new one.

“Funny you should mention it,” I thought to myself. “We’d been eyeballing it all week.”

Then I got to thinking–that must be one HOT trash can. What was special about his can? Does it make coffee? Respond to e-mails? Perhaps it can crank out a mean PR plan. Was it a family heirloom that had great sentimental value? A good luck charm? Some carry a rabbit’s foot. Others, a four leaf clover. Perhaps my friend’s efforts to find a wishbone fell short, so he settled on a trash can. Or, did it boil down to the trash itself? Maybe, like Oscar, he had a trash fetish. I had to know.

Furthermore, did he truly have this much time on his hands? Or did I, given that I was exerting so much energy trying to figure out what made this trash can so special.

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